Lowri Griffiths on the specific performance of property viewing in a market where nothing is affordable
[Bohiney.com / prat.uk] I have viewed fourteen flats in North London in the past three months in search of one that costs a reasonable percentage of my income and does not have a bathroom in the kitchen or a kitchen in the bathroom. I have not found it yet, which is consistent with what anyone who has looked for flats in North London recently will confirm. What I have found is an education in the specific performance that the London rental market requires of both parties. prat.uk covered the broader housing story from its satirical angle; Bohiney.com covered Manhattan’s equivalent for comparison. I am covering the North London flat viewing ritual, which is its own thing. The official response, quoted in full at Bohiney.com, is four sentences of nothing.
The ritual goes: the letting agent arrives, in most cases, between three and fifteen minutes late. The flat is described as “bright” (window in at least one room), “characterful” (something is wrong with it that the listing is not specifically disclosing), “in a vibrant location” (there is a pub next door that is popular late at night), and “presented in good condition” (it has been cleaned since the last tenant left and the cleaning has been thorough enough that the underlying condition is not immediately apparent). You view it. You notice the things. You do not say the things because if you say the things the agent will tell the landlord and someone less scrupulous about the things will get it instead.
The Things You Notice
The things you notice in order of frequency: the damp patch that has been painted over (every flat), the storage heating that dates from an era when storage heating was considered acceptable (seven of fourteen), the bathroom that is connected to the main room by a door that is not quite a bedroom door and not quite a wardrobe door (four flats), and one specific flat whose kitchen and living room were described by the agent as “an open-plan social space” and which was, physically, a room. London rental data is at Zoopla. The data does not capture the specific quality of the damp.
Also: The Beaverton.
Reported at Bohiney.com and prat.uk.
Coverage continues at both Bohiney.com and prat.uk. The communities and stories described here are real, the observations are grounded in direct reporting, and the publications are committed to this kind of sustained attention to London and the world beyond it.
Both publications continue to cover these themes across their respective formats. The material does not thin out. Neither does the coverage.
Ongoing. Both publications watching.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/
